Before anyone builds the Aid and Attendance file, the claim needs proof that Dad served and what his service was. That proof usually sits in one document, the DD Form 214 separation record. When a usable copy is not in the house, you have two routes: request the record yourself, or pay a company to request it for you. The free route is often enough. The question is whether the paid route gets you anything you cannot get on your own.
Local option: New Plan Care gives families in the St. Louis area in-home help so a parent can stay home: companionship, help with bathing and dressing, meals, and overnight care. Call (314) 405-0887.
Check what you already hold
Look before you request. Search Dad's papers, any folder a family member keeps, old pension or loan paperwork, and any copy filed with an earlier claim. A copy is usable when it is complete and legible, with the branch, dates of service, character of service, and type of discharge all readable. A photo that cuts off the box details, or a copy missing a page, is not enough to build the packet on. In that case you need a fresh copy from the record holder.
The free route: request it yourself
Dad can request his own service record. If he cannot make the request, a next of kin can, but the request has to show the family relationship, and the form asks for the details that prove it. Ask what the records office needs before you send anything, because a request returned for missing fields costs you the wait twice. The government request forms and online options are listed on the VA.gov pages about requesting military service records [1].
Fill in the fields that identify the file: the full name used during service, the service number or the identifiers the form asks for, date and place of birth, branch, approximate dates of service, and the reason for the request. Write down the date you sent it and the method you used. Keep a copy of everything you send.
A county or state veterans service officer, or an accredited veterans service organization, can often request the file for you at no charge. The St. Louis offices listed on the Local Help page are the place to start if you want that help without paying a fee.
The paid route: what a records service adds
A paid service can make sense when you cannot manage the forms, when Dad's file is hard to locate, or when you cannot spare the time. Before you pay, ask these questions and get the answers in writing:
Which office will receive the request, and does the service send it there directly or through you?
Does the price cover only the service's own work, or also any government copy charge? Ask for each line separately.
What will you receive: a full copy of the record, or only a summary the service prepared?
Will you get the request number and the date it was sent, so you can check its status on the government side?
If the file is not found or the request is rejected, who pays for a resubmission, and how long does that take?
Which of Dad's identifiers will the service need, where will they be stored, and who will see them?
A service that cannot name the receiving office or will not give you a confirmation you can check is not giving you something the request needs.
Avoid the look-alike sites
Search results often show companies whose names and layouts resemble government pages. Reach the official request pages yourself, from the VA.gov pages cited here, rather than from an ad or an unsolicited call. Do not enter Dad's identifiers into a form you reached from a phone call or a pop-up. Before you pay anyone, read the agreement for the fee and any authority it gives the service to act for Dad, and check it against the terms on the Sources page.
Decide before the wait starts
If you already hold a complete copy, stop there and put it in the packet. If you do not, send the free request first, log the date, and set a date to check on it. Pay for outside help only for a specific gap the free route cannot fill, and only after the price and the deliverables are written down. Do not let the records request hold up everything else. Ask the veterans service officer whether the claim can be started while the record request is still pending, and get that answer in writing as well.
For the wider sequence of steps and who to call, see Start Here: The Order to Read.
[1] VA.gov, pages on requesting military service records and the DD Form 214. The full list of references is on the Sources page.